The Case of the Peanut Butter and Almond Thief
I’m bored. And at work. So, enjoy!
Someone has been eating my peanut butter. At least, I think so.
I opened the new jar yesterday, and left several gaping holes in the once-smooth surface. I opened the jar today and more was missing than I recall eating. The surface was also smoothed out, like someone had merely scraped across it with a knife. Who does that?
One of my two roommates asked me today if I ate her almonds.
I can’t physically eat almonds.
I sense a conspiracy. I wonder if my other roommate is missing food…
Haven’t seen my other roommate yet. I looked in the cupboard she uses and there’s very little food in it. Maybe the food thief has been even more cruel to her than to Maryssa and I. What would go with peanut butter and almonds?
More peanut butter has gone missing from the jar. It’s been a week since I used it last, but I am almost certain I left several potholes where my knife scooped out lumps of the heavenly substance. Yet now the surface is smoothed out again. This peanut butter and almond thief is far too kind to peanut butter, and far too cruel to me. I paid for that peanut butter, I never said the thief could use any!
I asked Maryssa if she used my peanut butter. I didn’t think she had, but I asked anyways. She said she hadn’t.
I haven’t seen Chris. I don’t see anything missing from her cupboard, but my photographic memory isn’t what it used to be. I didn’t check the fridge.
I was surprised this morning to wake up and see Chris sleeping in her bed across the room. She was still asleep when I left for work, and was gone by the time I got home. She left all the lights on again, but at least she locked the door.
I ran out of milk today. I could have sworn I still had half a gallon… My memory must truly be fading in my old age.
I finally got to talk to Chris today. I asked her if she was missing any food, but she said no. What kind of thief is so particular?
I should stop eating so much bread. Since when did I make so many sandwiches? I’ve only had this loaf two days and it’s nearly gone.
Maryssa locked her cupboard shut with a bike lock. That’s clever, maybe I should invest in one. I can’t keep buying more peanut butter just to unwillingly share it with the thief. For now, I’ll be more vigilant at making sure the apartment door is always locked.
The thief ate the rest of my peanut butter and gave me the empty jar back. How kind.
I need to go grocery shopping — Again! I don’t understand. The door is always locked. The only way the food thief could get in would be if it was… a ghost! Or maybe a pixie? I’m not sure. I’ll leave a donation of milk and honey if it’s the latter. If it’s the former, I’m not sure what to do. Call the Ghostbusters?
The thief ignored the milk and honey and went straight for my applesauce. The door was locked all night. It must be a ghost. I asked Chris and Maryssa if they were missing food and they said no. The ghostly food thief must love to target me. What a bully!
I looked up some ghost traps online. Laid them today. Wonder what I’ll catch…
Writing prompt: What would your ghost traps catch?